I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
PS: I just woke up from my shower
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I enjoy the company of your penis
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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