Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
