she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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