i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
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