____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Sacagawea was the original milf.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize
