So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Randomize
