Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
