Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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