So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
That's how pantless uber rides happen
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
