I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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