I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I have aggressive nipples.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
