you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
the liver wants what the liver wants
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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