Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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