That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
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