This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize