It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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