belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Randomize
