so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
