In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
