i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
