I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Dating After Heartbreak
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.