her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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