he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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