so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
