when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
