I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Randomize
