so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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