Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
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