its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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