Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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