Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
