On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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