I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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