I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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