help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
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