wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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