I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
