all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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