I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize