dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
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remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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