Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
