Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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