She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
He felt like a one man threesome
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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