hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
