at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
