As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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