Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize
