"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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