Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
You need Xanax blowdarts
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize