im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
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