Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
