Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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